I'm so lucky to have a friend like Izzy that is a kindred soul, just graduated living in Portland and dreaming of New York. It's been almost three months since we graduated now, which is apparently about the time it takes getting comfortable doing anything. I remember by my second term in college I began to feel comfortable despite the massive change, and now that I'm back home, it has taken about the same amount of time to get comfortable in my routine of doing almost everything that I wished I wasn't.
Izzy and I had a conversation about this the other day when we were getting a drink – where we have many revelations about our lives and our journeys toward where we think we want to be – and to us, the comfort that we are starting to feel is scary. Fear is not always something you associate with comfort, but for us it represents complacency and worry that we won't keep pushing, won't keep moving forward. To me, that is almost more scary than failing ... settling into a life that I know I don't want.
I don't need my life to be comfortable right now, and simply put, I would rather it not be. Ask me again in another ten years and there's a good chance that my mind will be made up in the exact opposite direction, but for now, I'm ready to be living in a new place where I don't know anyone, doing things I have never done, and probably living paycheck to paycheck. I'm pretty sure I will change as a person more in the next ten years than any other decade in my life. And I want to make that change worthwhile.